The Butt Fumble Week 2: Having Fun With Fantasy

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John Solis

John Solis used to believe in the San Diego Chargers. Now he doesn't believe in anything.

The Solis Report, Pre-Draft Special Part II: An Idiot’s Guide to the 2019 Rookie Class, 1.01-1.12

John Solis April 22, 2019

Man, I feel like one of those guys on “House Surgery” or “House Eye for the House Guy” because I look around RotoViz today and it’s unrecognizable! Have you clicked some of these links? This site is a straight up stunner. They used to say Steve Jobs’ brilliance was in showing you what you didn’t even realize you desperately needed. It almost makes me want…...

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The Solis Report: Pre-Draft Special

John Solis April 3, 2019

These days, I’m not sleeping well. Every time I close my eyes a certain number burns bright against the red-black darkness of my inner eyelids. I wake up exhausted and drag myself as if underwater to the bathroom, little more than a spectator in my own life. Beneath the white noise of the shower, a low and sinister whisper: “32 Jokes™.” I shake my head and…...

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The Freedman Report Week 15: Cam Newton Wishes on a Monkey’s Paw

John Solis December 22, 2016

Ah, your season is over. You look back and count your mistakes. You start gearing up for the 2017 draft, even though Nick Chubb and Royce Freeman are no longer going to be a part of it. Ugh. You’re depressed, now. Denny Carter starts making sense. And yet, shimmering in the distance: 32 jokes that never cared whether you won or lost in the first place…....

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The Solis Report, Pre-Draft Special Part II: An Idiot’s Guide to the 2019 Rookie Class, 1.01-1.12

John Solis April 22, 2019

Man, I feel like one of those guys on “House Surgery” or “House Eye for the House Guy” because I look around RotoViz today and it’s unrecognizable! Have you clicked some of these links? This site is a straight up stunner. They used to say Steve Jobs’ brilliance was in showing you what you didn’t even realize you desperately needed. It almost makes me want…...

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The Solis Report: Pre-Draft Special

John Solis April 3, 2019

These days, I’m not sleeping well. Every time I close my eyes a certain number burns bright against the red-black darkness of my inner eyelids. I wake up exhausted and drag myself as if underwater to the bathroom, little more than a spectator in my own life. Beneath the white noise of the shower, a low and sinister whisper: “32 Jokes™.” I shake my head and…...

Membership Required

You must be a member to access this content.

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The Freedman Report Week 15: Cam Newton Wishes on a Monkey’s Paw

John Solis December 22, 2016

Ah, your season is over. You look back and count your mistakes. You start gearing up for the 2017 draft, even though Nick Chubb and Royce Freeman are no longer going to be a part of it. Ugh. You’re depressed, now. Denny Carter starts making sense. And yet, shimmering in the distance: 32 jokes that never cared whether you won or lost in the first place…....

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